Most gods throw dice, but Fate plays chess, and you don’t find out til too late that he’s been playing with two queens all along. Terry Pratchett Sometimes it feels that way. Even when it’s good. But then you don’t mind it so much. Some things are “truly meant to …
Justice There isn’t any. Or I’d be dead. And so would you. We have all gotten away with So much. Too much? Can you admit the truth to yourself? Can I? It is good Lady J is blindfolded She can’t see my angry eyes and crushed heart. I’d turn you …
There comes a time when you become too tired anymore to try to be other than you are. When the small talk becomes deafening. When the tension cannot be drowned no matter how many times you hold it down. It may mean No more often. It may mean more time …
Things are getting better, truly they are. As Winston Churchill said: “If you are going through Hell, keep going.” I did and and do. And will. Some things are better. Â The change was necessary. This new change is necessary too. I would just like to stop being angry. I would …
It is for my own good. It is for my family’s good. I am trying to be good, to be better. My definition of that is different from yours. It is good for me to let you go. It is good that we can no longer be, whatever it was that …
My family are the ones who spend time within these walls. The tall nervous girl, eager to please so sensitive and kind. The Man who always looks me in the eye and has walked with me through dark times and bright. These strange feline folk who have always loved unconditionally. …
Time has a way of wearing down, erasing, almost rearranging the self into something like but unlike. It seems you start this journey to adulthood thinking so many thoughts of who you will be, how you will be and when. Then life happens and those dreams, many of them are …
Em and I had a reading day not too long ago. We both hung out in our PJs and read Divergent. She with a paperback, me with my kindle. Her reading is way more sustained since she got glasses so we literally spent all day reading and talking about what …
I’m very tired, these last few days because of some significant changes I’m making in my life. My C, probably forever and always will be cats. Cats were my friends when I had none. Cats were my parents when my parents were not around. When I couldn’t live for me …
No one can and no one may. We ourselves must walk the path. I  think that was the Buddha. To me it means We have to make the choices, we have to make the decisions on what we fix about our lives and when. I don’t want to change what …
The answer is obvious and the question not fully known. The path is clear and trapped with brambles. The cup filled with comfort and regret. It seems like one decision after another keeps having to be made. And by that I mean by me. Me, making decisions. I’ve learned …
The thing is that there’s always an underlying tension. You’re only ever one wrong word away from it all going wrong. You can never relax. If you don’t give  the due respect or adoration, or if you disagree , or whatever tiny trigger sets  them off, then you get at …
Sweet Bartleby, a photo by jyllianm on Flickr. My ever present boyo. He follows me upstairs, he’s there when I’m sick. He comforts me and is my Siamese shadow. For a siamese guy he doesn’t talk much and he’s very different from the Siamese I’ve had before…but then all cats …
It’s a box with a cat in it, a photo by jyllianm on Flickr. They are like cat traps you know? If you needed to trap a cat, put a box down, you don’t even need food. I think paper attracts them faster.
A while back I decided to learn html. A long while ago. I’ve built my websites myself for years until one day I paid a friend to do so because, well, because it was a good thing to do. And I’ve traded building my site for  things as well, because …
It has been a long winter.  A very long winter. There have been actual feet of snow. There have been too many inches of ice. Many missed days of school and work.  I think it is 11 or 12 now.  What you see in these pictures isn’t actually snow, it’s …
Oh I’ve been stewing on this for awhile.  I’m sick of being underestimated because I’m nice. Or because I’m quiet. Because I surely am the former but not so much the latter. Well If you know me. If you don’t or if Iâ€m in a situation I’m not fully …
J with his cat Zak. Em leaning on him. This picture says a lot somehow about our family. I don’t know what exactly but I love everything going on here. Her pretty face and big eyes, elegant fingers on her Dad’s back. J with his companion of 14 years. Zak …
