Drab dribs

I find myself getting the urge to just post “Hello, I’m still here and this is a post.” But I won’t. Exactly.

I’m trying to reschedule the little happy hour thing we were going to do but canceled because of J’s mom’s injury. Only 6 more sleeps, as the Bean says, and he’ll be home.

I got a new CD/mp3 player for the kitchen, since the wee one I’ve had for 6 years finally died a horrid death. Cooking is much easier and more fun (and ends up being more ornate) when accompanied by music.

I know I had several thoughts today about “hmm that would be good to blog about,” but I’ve forgotten now. I’m still dealing with some hurt feelings and now some anger. I am working to let it go. I may no longer go out of my way for this person, but I don’t have to be actively angry. Well then, how do YOU let go of angry feelings? I’m meditating and I’m writing in my other journal (I have a locked livejournal I’ve been writing in since 2002) and cleaning. Still, the feelings are hanging around.

I wish I could get a trip to SF, but after this week J won’t be able to take any more time off work for awhile. Sigh.

On an entirely unrelated note: Since I opened up commenting–making it so that you didn’t have to register but did have to leave an email/web address and moderation is still turned on–I’ve gotten some of *the*most*hideous* and *disgusting* spam ever. Frightful. Will they just go away after a while if they never make it through to post? Yuck. I’m not a terrible prude (oh the stories I could tell you) but this really is nasty.

And..I’ve been leaving comments on other’s blogs. Not getting many in return, though I know from my new cool feedjit who is visiting. Like that, learned it on someone’s blog from the not very random randomizer.

I’m going to put this up now and hopefully an actually topic to write on will appear to me later. All I can think about right now though is this hurt feeling and the knowledge that J is in Bakersfield while I’m ovulating. Each one missed feels like it will be the last good one. Or the one we should have or or…

Technorati : miscarriage, nablopomo