However long the night

However long the night

the dawn will break (African proverb ?)

It isn’t all darkness and woe. Yes there is so much and those of us who are heavily empathetic are having a difficult time with the fear, sorrow, anger , racism, and misogyny that some of us (like I am) are somewhat insulated from. I am insulated because I’m white. I’m insulated because of our socio-economic status (middle class). I am insulated because I no longer live in a red state. I am insulated for many more reasons than I even know yet.  And for those reasons, it is difficult to allow myself respite and joy.

But it is impossible to not feel the reverse of  all the horrible right now–at least at times.

Daughter loves theatre and opera. I was able to hear, for the first time, her sing opera. And to see her perform in “The Man Who Came to Dinner.”These are joys.  I am looking forward to a year of her attempting new things, like vocal competition and traveling to Europe with a performance choir. The time with her is going so quickly I want to experience every second of joy that amazing girl brings.  We are going to support her in her hopes for a career in the arts, as scary as that is for her father and I. We were both discouraged from our youthful dreams. Later we discouraged ourselves for the safety we didn’t feel growing up.

Here’s why we will support her:

We are so grateful to her Choir Director, her Theatre Director and her voice teacher. They have made a huge difference and impact on her and her life. Seeing her have that is also a joy. Being grateful is a joy in itself, I think. I tend to sound more woeful than I am. I don’t like that. I don’t like pretending to be cheerful though either. Balance and knowing the darkness always gives way to light.