Life is partly what we make it, and partly what it is made by the friends we choose. Tennessee Williams

Life is partly what we make it, and partly what it is made by the friends we choose. Tennessee Williams

Before I get to Reverb10, I need to mention the two most important things that happened in the last two days.

One—The Bean had a solo with her choir. She wasn’t nervous at all, she was happy and excited. She remembered all her words (in Hebrew no less) and hit all her notes. Tonight she had a speaking part, a short solo singing bit and was a Chinese dancer in the Nutcracker for her grade musical. She was wonderful. I will have some pictures up soon.

They don’t tell you in the “so now you are a parent book” that when you see you kid do something that you know is a big deal, like singing a solo at a Christmas Concert at the Walton Arts Center to a packed house, that you will be so much prouder of them than you ever could be of something you did yourself. That the feeling of joy, excitement and just the thrill of watching your kid do something cool is one of the largest feelings you can have.

At least that is my experience.

December 7 – Community

Community. Where have you discovered community, online or otherwise, in 2010? What community would you like to join, create or more deeply connect with in 2011?

Well, I’m not feeling it right now, honestly because I’m hurting. I usually come home at 4 and lie down, get off my leg. The last two nights I’ve had to come home and do the kidlet’s hair and makeup, get her in costume or performance attire and then go to the performances. And I’m bursting with pride about her performances, it’s just physically a stretch for me right now.

That’s good I suppose. Even if I’m likely not going to be able to actually jog or run well, ever. I do hope to be back taking my cemetery walks by January, ok end of January.

As for community, I guess I’ve found it a couple of places. I think I’m making contact through nablopomo and reverb10. I am reading blogs I never would have come across and I’m really glad about that. I keep ending up on Bay Area blogs, which is making me kind of homesick (yes yes I know I was born in NWA, but living in SF for 14 years makes me a native). I like reading people’s blogs, not internet celebrity blogs. Those are nice –I mean Dooce is certainly slick and funny for example—but it can be a bit intimidating when you think about throwing your own voice into the void. It’s good to know there are other folks out there doing the same thing. It’s  The mix is good too. Some folks I’m reading are where I am, some a couple of steps better, some just getting started and there’s been support and encouragement to keep at it.

The other community is I guess school. School is where I work and through our daughter’s school we are meeting other parents. It’s tough for me, for us to be joiners, but sometimes you have to let the tide take you out. Our daughter is not shy and she’s made some really nice friends who have really nice parents. And so we get invited places and we’re going because they are nice and it is the right thing to do. And it is good.

The same for work. I work with some really great teachers at two really great schools. And as much as I miss the more hardcore tech work I’ve done in the past, I have to say the talking to humans, not just machines is really good. I’m not always hungry for human interaction. I was enough of a hermit (and J is naturally that way) that it was easy for me to run low on socializing and then sort of explode or go overboard when I got a little. Now I get enough extroversion daily that I’m full. Sometimes overfull, but then I can hide a bit and it re-balances. I love being around the kids and more of that will be coming by way soon—more co-teaching is in the works. I have so many exciting ideas about how to get tech working as a normal part of most schoolwork and the teachers I work with are so receptive. There’s a lot of uncharted territory for me and my shipmates are some of the nicest, most caring folks I’ve met.

For next year? I’d like to get more involved in the life of the school—the socializing (I’ve just started that) and the after hours things the teachers do for the kids. I’ll have to find more energy though and not do so much that I miss out on things with the Bean.

I’d also like to find a way to socialize with my friends that I’m comfortable with. I have finally recognized that some situations just make me feel weird and that I shouldn’t make myself do them anymore. I’d like shared activities like poetry slams or First Thursdays. I’d like to go to the theatre or do things like water skiing. I’d like to have experiences with my friends. I’m not very good at that, so it will take effort. I’m trying to do this by saying yes when people ask us to do something—as long as it doesn’t involve oh the zombie apocalypse or small enclosed spaces.

Well what just came out of me is more than I thought I had in me. cool. Now bed. Tomorrow we have to get a tree and I have to figure out how I’m going to get some Xmess shopping done!


  1. Here’s to parental pride! 🙂

    Sorry to hear you are hurting! One of the toughest aspects to recovery is not over-doing it.

    It’s so hard not to overdo, though, because when you feel a tiny bit better you just wanna jump back into life at full speed. I am learning that with my anemia. Actually, I don’t know if it really constitutes learning since I keep making the same mistake! I get so excited on days that I have energy that I overdo it, then pay for it later.

    “what just came out of me is more than I thought I had in me. cool.” Happens to me, too! Ain’t it great?

    I’m with ya on the Nablo community stuff. I’m also with ya on the small enclosed spaces…


  2. Thank you for your comments Tui, I really appreciate them. I love quote hunting. I try to find them from something I’ve read so I have to really think if they fit or not.
    I have the same issue–start to feel better and want to be DONE with being injured/sick. But I’ve got about three more weeks.

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